I came up leaning…


There is a song that is frequently sung in the prayer room that was the ‘story of my life’ while in the internship last year.

I know the end of the story
I come up from the wilderness, leaning on my Beloved

While in internship I would cry out those words to God, it was what I clung too as He did heart surgery on me. I would sing these lyrics praying, hoping that I would one day come out of the wilderness, that I would come up leaning on Him. Leaning on Him as a posture of trusting Him with all that I am, trusting His leading and leadership in my life. These lyrics will always have a special meaning to me.

Today I now stand strong on the solid rock that is Jesus saying I came up leaning on my beloved. I have arrived to the season he was leading me too for the last 9 months. I am entering into my personal promise land from the Lord. Some of you may be asking what the heck is she talking about. She is no isrealite, your right I am not. But I am a child of God who has walked through my fair share of battles, and this is the analogy the Lord has used for this season.

  I found myself at the beginning of the year feeling like I was in a desert, but it was where the Lord had me. I knew He had led me there, so I was to embrace the season. I had to lean on Him. I had nothing else to do but trust His working in my life. The dreams in my heart seemed so far away, I thirsted for truth, for life. Sometime after turning 25 I began to feel hope restored, life had a new meaning. I woke up everyday + still do feeling like the entire world is available, nothing is impossible. Day after day of waking up feeling like this I began to realize this is not just a today is a good day, this was supernatural. This was Jesus’ strength, not my own. It is Christ. My mood, my circumstances could be far from perfect but my heart and spirit were so focused on gazing upon this man Jesus putting faith in the words He spoke over me. Focusing on Him enabled me to see the truth about life. That truth/reality is not necessarily my circumstances, my finances, my relationships…The truth, my reality is Jesus, and from that truth I allow Him to invade every part of my life. Bringing heaven to earth in my heart, mind, soul, spirit.

That brings us to today, for those of you who are not aware today is the Jewish New Year as of sunset. And let me tell you I feel it. NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE. God shall + has restored all. Just keep watching in your lives for the physical manifestation of it… Those dreams in my heart…He breathed life into them, it was Him all along that kept me believing that He would accomplish His good will in my life.  And He is. He has. And He will continue too.

+ I shall praise Him for it. He is worthy of all my adoration! For I came up leaning on my beloved. There were days + nights when I wasn’t sure that I would come out of the desert, I was unsure of quite how the Lord would have His way. He would gently remind me it is not my job to figure out, it is my job to lean, trust, and partner with Him…He is my partner for life. What an honor!

{Let me be clear in case of any misunderstand/mis-interpreation, I am outlining the last 9 month journey as a season of life that has now passed, and I am now moving onto the next. I am not saying this is the end of growth by any means. The last 9 months for me have been so transforming, so I wanted to share this journey for those who may be on a similar journey:}

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